Lieth Hard. Leaneth Heavy.
This past Monday was the absolute Mondayest Monday that has ever Mondayed.
I woke up bright eyed and bushy-tailed late, so getting everyone ready for work and school was a wild ride on the Hot Mess Express.
For some odd reason, my students at school acted more like rabid chickens than children, and I almost quit 5 times.
After work, in the 55 minutes we had between school and Abie’s cheer game, the kids and I ran by Sam’s Club to make some returns, where we stood in a 4-person line for 27 minutes.
We made it to Abie’s game on time but got in the gate late since we had to park 3 miles away. During the game, it of course rained, and I enjoyed endured my two boys running around my chair in circles and pushing each other down. (No, they are not toddlers. They are 14 and 12, and they often act like they are on Crack.)
Jacin had to work late, so he joined our squirrel show in the 3rd quarter.
The game ended, and we walked the three miles out to our cars. While the boys ran circles around us (again) and Abie wandered in the middle of the road we were crossing, Jacin expressed his desire to go to a sit-down restaurant for dinner. All three kids immediately chimed in, yelling their preferences and arguing with one another.
I’m embarrassed to admit that I almost came undone.
I started shaking and stammering, “I can’t. I just can’t anymore.”
I put my hands over my eyes and tried some deep breathing. “You need to take these kids and feed them somewhere. I don’t’ care where. And please take your sweet time. I’m going home to hide.”
And without even an “adios,” I climbed into my car and slammed it into reverse. Jacin and the kids stood there in the parking lot looking at me with their mouths open. I’m pretty positive their conversation in Jacin’s truck was about how and why Mom had come unhinged.
Meanwhile, I drove all the way home in thirty minutes of silence. I waked in the house, grabbed my notebook and Bible and jumped under the covers in my bed.
Here’s what I wrote in my journal:
God, I’m exhausted. I’m overwhelmed. I need a promise. Remind me of one of your promises, God. Please give me something to hold onto. My brain is fried and my heart is tired. Please, God. Give me a Word.
I stayed under the covers for a while and then got up to start washing dishes. I can’t explain why or how, but as soon as I turned the water on, this verse came up in the front of my mind, clear and insistent, like a text from God’s phone that I couldn’t ignore:
“You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you because he trusts you.” (Is 26:3)
I immediately turned the water off, grabbed my journal and Bible again, and started researching. Yes, this was a verse I had memorized (though at the moment I couldn’t have brought it to mind on my own. Thanks, God!). But no, this wasn’t a verse I had really dug into in a while. I had work to do.
I’d love to share with you what I found when I studied this verse phrase by phrase:
(For context: The chapters before this, Isaiah 24 and 25, describe the day when the Messiah will finally triumph. Isaiah chapter 26 describes the “strong city” Jesus will establish for His forever rule.)
“You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you because he trusts you.” (Is 26:3)
“You keep…” - God does this for me! Even though He is in charge of the entire universe, He still sees me and cares for me (especially on the Mondayest of Mondays).
“You keep…” - KEEP! This is one of my favorite Hebrew words! (In fact, it’s the inspiration for my website title. Read about it here.) It’s amazing to think that God Himself guards, protects, and surrounds me. “He is my hiding place! He preserves me in times of trouble” (Ps 32:7).
In perfect peace…” - The Hebrew word used here for both perfect and peace is shalom, meaning complete soundness, safety, and quiet contentment. I love that this word is repeated in this verse - “shalom, shalom.” It’s like God is reminding me that His presence brings me complete completeness. God doesn’t just offer us peace. He offers us peaceful peace - abundantly more than anything or anyone else ever could.
“Whose mind is stayed on you…” - That word stayed is a cool word. One Hebrew dictionary defines it as “to lieth hard” or to lean on heavily. I can just see that picture in my mind: leaning on Jesus hard and heavy. Let that be me!
“because he trusts you.” - The Hebrew word used here for trust means to have so much confidence in something or someone that you feel totally safe and are freed up to live boldly (even recklessly!). THIS is the kind of trust I want to have in Jesus.
My time at the kitchen table, studying this verse God gave me, was sweet, and I’m thankful to say I was in much better spirits when Jacin and the kids returned home. Each morning this week, I’ve returned to Isaiah 26, rereading the chapter and my study notes, thanking God for answering me and just marveling at the depth and richness of God’s Word.
Lord,
You promise to grant perfect peace to those who focus on you and trust you. Help me do that. Help me “stay” my mind on you. Help me lean on you hard and heavy. Help me trust you fully. Thank you for speaking to me through your Word, and thank you for your perfect peace.
Keep keeping me, Lord.
